Reviews (49)

It saved my best friend! A must have!
I could sense for a long time that my best friend was going through some serious personal problem but he didn't want to tell me about it. A few weeks ago he came to me and confessed that he is addicted to sex, his life was getting out of control and he badly needs help and support. As a recently married I too was quite prone to be more sexually active so I decided that it is a very good idea to have this book just in case. I gave it to him as well as the bestseller "scientifically guaranteed male multiple orgasms and ultimate sex".As he shared with me Dr. Carnes proved him black on white this is a kind of diseases which can be cured. Then scientist Ritz showed him how to gradually eliminate each of the health problems caused by chronic overejaculating. My best friend was getting better with every day and I am so thankful to these 2 great authors for covering A-Z the psychological and physiological aspects and treatment of this serious problem. That's why I urge you to get both books because they compliment each other perfectly. They WILL help you to understand and eliminate your addiction and have normal and incredible sexual life after that!

Great service, fast shipment!
Happy to recommend - shipped very quickly, book in excellent condition!

Well written
Sexual addiction is almost impossible to understand or comprehend by the non-sexually addictive person. This book is written in a way that is easy to read and very easily understood, by both the addict and the non-addict. It puts into perspective what, why and how the sex addict functions. It takes the burden of guilt and frustration "off" his/her partner and re-inforces that addiction is a disease, and in many ways not a choice. ... Read more

Subjects:  1. General    2. Self-Help    3. Sex addiction    4. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    5. Illness & addiction: social aspects    6. Mind, body, spirit: disciplines & techniques    7. Popular psychology    8. Self-Help / Substance Abuse    9. Sex & sexuality   

Reviews (14)

My husband's secret revealed..I needed answers..I found them here!!
Easily, I could say that Patrick Carne's books on sexual addiction has saved my marriage and my husband's life and maybe my own as well. My first read was "Out of the Shadows" and it softened my angry heart after hearing my husbands confession of being with around 100 women over the past 5 years of our 17 year marriage and all sexual encounters were UNPROTECTED sex. I found out the hard way. How could all these powerful, crippling emotions that I was feeling be tamed?? How could I ever forgive this scrum of the earth!! READ this book and you can do the impossible!!
As an Addiction Therapist I recommend this book to all of my clients seeking recovery from addiction to sex
Carnes can be readily credited for leading the way in developing a sound understanding of sex addiction and importantly, the treatment of this. By presenting sexually destructive behaviour within the paradigm of "addiction", Carnes has succesfully created a "problem to solution" model which offers a way out of sexually addictive behaviour. In "Don't Call it Love" Carnes offers a plan for living and a route out of this powerfully compelling condition. He manages to present a readable and coherent guide, outlining the multiple dimensions of both sex addiction and recovery from this. In his usual realisitic and compassionate style, this book makes it clear that the process of abstinence and recovery is concerned with helping "Good people get well" rather than helping "Bad people be good". Fundamentally, this book offers a clear message of hope to any person affected by sex addiction that recovery is indeed possible and importantly - enjoyable !!

A Life-Changing Book for Many People
"Don't Call It Love," by Patrick Carnes, is an important book in the growing body of literature on recovery from sexual addiction. Although it was published in 1991, it is still widely read and frequently quoted by recovering sex addicts.
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Subjects:  1. Mental Illness    2. Recovery    3. Rehabilitation    4. Self-Help    5. Sex addiction    6. Sex addicts    7. Sexual behavior    8. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    9. Modern fiction    10. Self-Help / Addiction   

Reviews (25)

The Real Source of the Problem
I'm a pastoral counselor and spiritual director who specializes in sexual addiction counseling and groups and who's work in this area comes from personal experience, not just my training and theoretical understanding. I recommend "False Intimacy" more than any other book for men who are battling the behavior of sexual addiction, but who also desperately want to deal with the source of the struggle and not just stop at choking off the expression of the struggle (although that is critical).Dr. Schaumburg does the best job that I've seen of exploring the actual motivational power of sexual addiction, which ironically in the end is not essentially sexual.Very few books on this subject actually expose what is really going on below the behavioral and psychological patterns, but there will be no long-term meaningful freedom without facing what fuels the temptation and acting-out cycle.Clearly this is a more difficult and less popular approach (that's why so few books or groups actually engage the issue to this depth), but any other approach to this problem is "bringing a knife to a gun fight." The two alternatives to dealing with this issue can be summed up as 1) stopping the sexual acting out or sexual sin, or 2) through broken dependence upon Christ becoming the kind of men who are not controlled by lust.The 2nd alternative is what Dr. Schaumburg is inviting the reader to and is the only approach that changes the whole person and not just the behavior. I highly recommend this book and the journey it invites the reader to take in their soul - whether a sex addict or not.

Review of False Intimacy
The book, False Intimacy, arrived in excellent condition and it's content is truly amazing and informative.Dr. Shaumburg is definitely serving Jesus Christ with this book and is following Christ's calling in his life.From the original sin of Adam and Eve until now, man will always deal with sin hear on Earth, but Dr. Shaumburg offers wonderful Christian insight into the specific topic of different behavoirs we become involved in trying to fill a place in our heart that only Jesus' Holy Spirit can fill.The key is be submissive to Jesus' Holy Spirit.
God's Cure for "Overmuch Love"
"False Intimacy" is actually a much better and broader title than the subtitle, for Schaumburg's work is not only about sexual addiction. It is about what the Puritans called "overmuch love"--loving anything more than we love God. It is about what the Reformers called "idols of the heart"--placing anything in first place above God.
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Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - General    3. Christianity - Christian Life - Sexuality    4. Intimacy (Psychology)    5. Religion    6. Religion - Socialissues    7. Religious aspects    8. Religious life    9. Sex addiction    10. Sex addicts    11. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    12. Sex & sexuality   

Reviews (10)

Practical, comprehensive help... builds acceptance of discipline, grace and truth.
I have talked to many who have attempted to recover fromdestructive sexual habits; their underlying problem is often quite complex. For the person who is starting to desire freedom, there is usually confusion and a lack of awareness of what is happening inside one's heart and mind to bring about this kind of chronic behavior.
Great Book
As for the only negative feedback I saw on here....Sexual addictions can very much destroy homes, families, jobs, and ones self.
1st book I tried, all I really needed!
Without reiterating what the other reviewers have said, this book was just so helpful to me in understanding my cybersex addition and finding comfort in the love of God to heal my wounds and bring me peace.My sister sent me the book right after I was fired for watching porn on the internet at work (worst day of my life).I have always considered myself a Christian, though was always at war with myself because of my "secret" side (and I'm no "bible thumper").Besides seeing God's work in my being fired, this book brought me so much freedom and joy through knowing that there was a way out and God had/would forgive me if I continued to repent for my past.I've "fallen off the wagon" several times in the past year, and I'm about to read this book again to get me back on the right track.If you're addicted, or think you might be, and want to find a Christ-centered way out, don't even hesitate - BUY THIS BOOK and READ IT. ... Read more

Subjects:  1. Applied Christian Sexual Ethics    2. Christianity    3. Inspirational - Protestant Self Help    4. Rehabilitation    5. Religious aspects    6. Religious life    7. Self-Help    8. Sex Relations    9. Sex addiction    10. Sex addicts    11. Substance Abuse & Addictions - General    12. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual   

Reviews (10)

You are NOT alone!
This book has helped me realize that I am not alone and that it is completely NORMAL to have these types of feelings.
Realistic and helpful steps to restoration
Understanding why your spouse was stupid enough to become entangled in the porno web is one thing; forgiving him and restoring your relationship is quite another. This book lays it all bare and gives practical counsel that, if followed, will help a woman wanting to accomplish that end.
I found this book most helpful
Unlike some of the other reviews, I found this book most helpful. I liked that it is written to the Christian wife of a Christian husband. While my situation may not be exactly the same as the examples in the book there are similarities and I was able to figure out how I needed to respond to the information I recently learned. Before reading the book I knew I wanted something that would support my decision to work this out. I decided to read through it once and then I decided to "work" through it. Taking what I read and applying it to my situation, personality and marriage. I found it necessary to pray my way through this process and seek God's will and knowledge so that it would not be "about me" as much as it would be about our marriage and our future together. I would recommend this book. I agree it does not address if the woman has been sexually wounded or is dealing with her own sexual sin but I really don't think that was the intent of the authors. ... Read more

Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - General    3. Christianity - Christian Life - Marriage    4. Christianity - Christian Life - Sexuality    5. Family & Relationships    6. Family / Parenting / Childbirth    7. Family/Marriage    8. Husbands    9. Marriage    10. Religion - Marriage & Family    11. Religious aspects    12. Religious life    13. Sex addiction    14. Sexual behavior    15. Wives    16. Family & Relationships / Marriage   

Subjects:  1. Computer sex    2. Human Sexuality    3. Love / Sex / Marriage    4. Mental Illness    5. Psychology    6. Sex addiction    7. Sex counseling    8. Computer fraud & hacking    9. Psychology & Psychiatry / Human Sexuality    10. Psychotherapy    11. Sex & sexuality   

Reviews (13)

Highly recommended by professional
I sometimes work with people who are struggling with codependent behavior or sexual addictions. This is the book I most often recommend and I also think it is a great reference for professionals such as psychologists, personal coaches and psychiatrists.
Wonderful and private way to heal yourself from the inside!
Freedom from Relationship/ Co-Dependency/ Sexual Addictions is the greatest asset to this book.I started reading it when my relationship ended with a man I cared for.My bad relationship triggered many unrealistic emotions inside myself that caused me a lot of self damage by acting out and dating guys that were all bad for me because of my low self image since the break-up.
Not just for women!
This book is amazing. Read more

Subjects:  1. Codependents    2. Human Sexuality    3. Love    4. Mental health    5. Psychology    6. Sex addiction    7. Sociology    8. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    9. Women    10. Coping with personal problems    11. Psychology & Psychiatry / General    12. Women's studies   

Reviews (17)

Not for wives of husbands who want to change
I read this book for a friend and it was nowhere near as good as Breaking Free (by Russ Willingham) that my husband and I read to address the same problem. From what I gathered, Marsha Means has never herself experienced sexual betrayal, just the fear of it. She has some basic info on codependency in the book, but I would argue that the wife chapter in Breaking Free is just as practical without all the scary stories with no resolution. If your husband wants to change, read Breaking Free together and leave this one on the shelf. You might find yourself loving your husband through his not-so-secret wars, not just living with him.

very helpful
I have found this book to be very helpful in overcoming my husbands sexual addiction and affairs.I have referred back to it for guidence a lot in the past year.I highly suggest it to spouses who are struggling with a sexual addict.

Excellent and helpful
This book was very helpful to me at a difficult time in my life, when it seemed like nobody understood.In fact, at times I felt like she took thoughts right out of my mind.I feel that if you are in the position of having an unfaithful spouse, you will find that you are not alone and there is help. ... Read more

Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - General    3. Christianity - Christian Life - Marriage    4. Christianity - Christian Life - Women's Issues    5. Husbands    6. Marriage    7. Marriage (Christianity)    8. Personal Growth - Self-Esteem    9. Religion    10. Religion - Christian Life    11. Religious aspects    12. Religious life    13. Sex addiction    14. Sexual behavior    15. Wives    16. Family & Relationships / Marriage   

Subjects:  1. Clinical Chemistry    2. Human Sexuality    3. Medical    4. Mental Illness    5. Psychology    6. Psychopathology - Compulsive Behavior    7. Sex addiction    8. Illness & addiction: social aspects    9. Neurology & clinical neurophysiology    10. Psychology & Psychiatry / Clinical Psychology   

Reviews (6)

Straight forward and very practical
This book hits the nail on the head by dealing with the roots of sexual addiction and giving practical steps toward recovery.If you are ready to be free, then do the hard work of examining your childhood for any abuse or neglect, whether real or perceived, and you'll discover the lies you tell yourself to find comfort in impurity.This is where the real challenge is because we are so afraid of feeling that pain again.But I'm here to tell you that the path to healing is through the pain and discomfort of processing those experiences.Know this...emotional pain will not kill you but the addiction will.You will need help from others to do this but you can and you must do it to rid yourself of this demon.The book gives you all the info and direction to do this.

Must Have
Fabulous book. Beautifully explains the roots of as well as the pain involved in sexual addictions. Gives hope for those who struggle with this and would help friends and family to understand at least in part, what the addict is dealing with. This book recognizes sin as sin, but does so with a spirit of love and not condemnation. It is honest and inspiring.

Faithful and True: Sexual Integrity in a Fallen World
This is a small book, that enclosed a lot information about the begining of adictions, also talks about the reasons for what people are changing religions. Is very important to mention, one of the big problems of the sexual addictions. In one of the chapters Laaser said that the sexual addict could been abusedwhen they were babies and could been by his or her mother when she was chabging the pampers, or the mother played with the genitals, in the majority of cases this happens with boys. The sexual addict fulfill his emptyness with sex, drugs or alcohol or even going to church more often. Laaser include graphics in his book, where he explains in one cycle the reasons for sexual addictions. I understand this book very well, because I had the opportunity to take a class with Patrick Carness and he explained briefly the content of this book, used as text for the class at University of California Riverside Extension, How to Diagnose Addictions. Using the examples of Carness based in the book Faithful and True, I had the opportunity to diagnose one of my friends who was abandoned by his parents when he was a kid. His father moved from El Salvador to the United States and his mother devoted her life to the church after she changed her religion forgetting about her family. This is based on an example of Laaser about reason to cover up the sexual needs . This is a very good book, talks about the The Faithful and The Truth of this fallen world, I higly recommend this book to every body who has any addictions or he or she thinks is addicted to sex. Recognizing the addiction is the first step for the cure and learn to live with the addiction and Laaser gives plenty of examples for a new lifestyle. ... Read more

Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - General    3. Christianity - Christian Life - Sexuality    4. Rehabilitation    5. Religion    6. Religion - Christian Life    7. Religious aspects    8. Religious life    9. Sex addiction    10. Sex addicts    11. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    12. Christian Interest    13. Christian life & practice    14. Religion / Christian Life    15. Sexual behaviour   

Reviews (39)

Very interesting!!!!
This book helped people visualize howcommon it is for everyday people to be caught up in differentlifestyles. Basically you should not judge people without really knowing them!!

Refreshing and Amazing
I bought this book from the author at an event in DC.While I was not interested in reading your sterotypical "gay black male" book, the book was pleasantly suprising.I started the book and had a very difficult time putting it down.Good job Mr. Moore on a job well done.Thank you for allowing us to have an invitation into your life.

AWESOME READ!!
THIS BOOK WAS A GREAT READ FROM BEGINNING TO END! I HAVE READ PLENTY OF BOOKS BUT THIS ONE HELD MY ATTENTION FROM THE TIME I STARTED READING UP UNTIL THE TIME I FINISHED! MR MOORE I TRULY HOPE YOUR NEXT BOOK IS ON ITS WAY, BECAUSE WE NEED MORE GREAT AUTHORS LIKE YOU! ... Read more

Subjects:  1. Fiction / Psychological    2. Addicts    3. Athletes    4. Drug addiction & substance abuse    5. Male models    6. Sex addiction    7. Track and field   

Reviews (16)

Reality
I love it when an author addresses issues that are rarely talked about, especially issued that are rarely talked about in church.
Compassionate, passionate, humorous, on-target
Ted's personal experiences both in his struggle with sex addiction and in his career as a pilot provide a compelling unity to this book. He has a passion for helping the many people who struggle with this problem, but who are not receiving the help where they should be receiving it -- from their churches, who have the truth of the Bible, but often don't focus it in this area.
Excellent Resource for men and any other person connect with a man
Written from a Christian perspective, this book is a fabulous resource for all men. Intimate spousal relationships, healthy relationships in general, emotional health, and freedom from men's sexual guilt/shame cycles are all issues addressed in this practical book. If you want to learn about how God can lead men through the pathway of thinking He designed, this is a vital book for YOU as a man. ... Read more

Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - Social Issues    3. Christianity - Spiritual Warfare    4. Counseling    5. Pornography    6. Religion    7. Religion - Spiritual Warfare    8. Religious aspects    9. Sex addiction    10. Spirituality - General   

Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - General    3. Christianity - Christian Life - Marriage    4. Christianity - Christian Life - Sexuality    5. Family & Relationships    6. Family / Parenting / Childbirth    7. Family/Marriage    8. Husbands    9. Marriage    10. Religion - Marriage & Family    11. Religious aspects    12. Religious life    13. Sex addiction    14. Sexual behavior    15. Wives    16. Family & Relationships / Marriage   

Reviews (4)

Poor Copy Editing
Really great book that I use in my practice.The copy editing by the publisher keeps me from giving the book 5 stars.

Gay Man Struggling With Out-of-Control Sex? Here's Your Guidebook...
As a gay man who came out early, but never had any guidance on how to explore my sexuality other than negative messages from my conservative upbringing, I was like a kid in a candy store when I gained my "freedom".The marketers in my community promoted, packaged, and sold uninhibited, no-strings sexual encounters like cheap lolipops.The "perfect" man was found on every page in every gay rag, and presumably, in every bar or club.An so this is where I learned about sex."Relationships" were relegated to a small column on one of the back pages sandwiched between "escorts" and "one night stands".After 20 years of being encouraged to run from problems into the bed of the next, new hot stud, I realized my life was becoming more empty and isolated.My routine was work/gym/club/sex.I worked only to pay for the gym, the clubs, and ultimately, the sex. I slept when I had a chance.The internet made cruising easier.I spent hours each nite "setting up" encounters, perusing dozens if not hundreds of men online before selecting one or a few for a hook up.I ate and slept only when I found the time, or when my computer crashed. I could not go on a trip without setting up encounters while there, or cruising the bars, parks, bathhouses, etc.The thought of a relationship only brought on feelings of hopelessness. So it was back to cruising.This was my life.
Every gay male should read this book
Every gay male should read this book. If it doesn't help you, it could help you to help someone else. If you are spending alot of time cruising, but wish you could find a relationship, sex addiction could very well be your problem.
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Subjects:  1. Gay Studies    2. Gay men    3. Psychology    4. Recovery    5. Sex addiction    6. Sexual behavior    7. Social Science    8. Sociology    9. Substance Abuse & Addictions - General    10. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    11. Gay studies (Gay men)    12. Social Science / Gay Studies   

Reviews (5)

Good book, terrible problem.
This is a very useful book if you have a problem, or even think you might, with regard to compulsively searching for and/or using internet porn, chat rooms, etc.
amazingly valuable resource
My marriage ended because of my addiction to cybersex.
Alittle too Broad
This book is a good starting resource for anyone who's concerned with their time on the Internet, or sex addiction in general.There's only a couple of problems I've had with the book.Mostly, it's catagorizing of addiction seems exceptionally broad.I think any normal person could argue they had an addiction problem using the criteria listed within.Read more

Subjects:  1. Computer sex    2. Internet - World Wide Web    3. Pornography    4. Self-Help    5. Sex addiction    6. Substance Abuse & Addictions - General    7. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    8. Coping with personal problems    9. Impact of computing & IT on society    10. Internet    11. Sex & sexuality   

Features

• Abridged
• Audiobook

Reviews (1)

Another awesome work but not all women will respond
I have to start this review stating that I have many years of sexual addiction issue and "Every Man's Battle" is probably one of the best books on the subject ever written.It is because of the open honesty or Fred and Steve.Read more

Subjects:  1. Audio Adult: Books On Tape    2. Christianity - Christian Life - General    3. Christianity - Christian Life - Interpersonal Relationships    4. Sex addiction    5. Religion    6. Unabridged Audio - Inspirational/Philosophy    7. Religion / Christian Life   

Reviews (13)

Clarity From Confusion
I was given this book by a friend 8 years ago and was offended. I put it on a shelf and didn't bother with it for over a year. I read it one day when my life and marriage seemed to be falling apart, and I began to understand some of what was driving the chaos in my life. Beyond explanations, its message drew me toward a relationship with God and encouraged me to talk about things that seemed unspeakable to me. I found others who were working out these issues and began to redraw the canvas of my life. What a gift my friend gave me back then. I'm glad she had the courage to risk offending me to help me.

Definitely a Pass
I at first thought this would be the answer being I'm in recovery for love addiction and also that I am a psychotherapist. However, like others have found, within the first few pages you see the religious dogma this book spews. So, just as in the twelve step recovery programs, unless you buy into that dogma, which this book also quotes bible verses, this is a big PASS. What an eye opener!
This book was extremely helpful in my recovery.I learned how to evalute my own needs and the reasons I choose certain people to get in relationship with.It pulled she cover off my denial.Which is not a fun thing, but necessary for hope and a future.It may have prevented more heartbreak and pain in my future relationships.I felt like parts of this book were written about me.Dr. Arterburn obviously has a good grasp of codependency and other addictions.Buy it.It may change your life. ... Read more

Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - Interpersonal Relationships    3. Love & Romance    4. Psychology    5. Relationship addiction    6. Religion - Relationships    7. Religious aspects    8. Sex addiction    9. Social Psychology    10. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Other Specific   

Reviews (6)

What a load of crap
I just read the first 8 or so pages of this (whatever Amazon has up there to "browse") and this is such such such propaganda."Jack" obviously doesn't exist - I'm sorry but who says to his friends: "I mean it, this time no extramarital secret life."Fictitious characters, that's who.I wouldn't trust any of the facts in this book - they misrepresent the Titanic disaster pretty casually (the telegraph and the radio were used to enact the rescue mission , and to alert the papers).
This book helped my marriage
I didn't understand what was happening in my own home, that I was losing my relationship to a screen filled with images of women I don't know. I truly thought my husband was 'working' all that time in the den, while I was blaming myself, the kids, our finances, tiptoeing around to stay out of his way. Once I got a glimpse of what he was really doing online I bought Cybersex Exposed right away and what a gift it has been to me! It explained in reasonable terms, so many of the problems I had been experiencing. I wasn't crazy after all! And it gave me some real eduction and direction. I would recommend it to anyone.

decent, but ...
overall, i would say the book was decent.definitely good for someone who has no idea what sort of environments can be found on the internet.also, i'm sure that many people may find it helpful.Read more

Subjects:  1. Computer sex    2. Recovery    3. Self-Help    4. Sex addiction    5. Substance Abuse & Addictions - General    6. Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual    7. Internet    8. Marriage, family & other relationships    9. Sex & sexuality   

Subjects:  1. Christianity    2. Christianity - Christian Life - Marriage    3. General    4. Relationship addiction    5. Religion    6. Religion - Marriage & Family    7. Religious aspects    8. Sex addiction   

Reviews (1)

VERY helpful for recovery from this understudied problem
This book is a MUST for partners of sex addicts who want to work a recovery program and try to reach a place where they break out of their OWN dysfunctional behavior patterns. Most of us in this situation are drawn to sex addicts for a reason -- this book, in conjunction with other codependency recovery materials, is EXTREMELY helpful in breaking through denial about OUR problems and coming to terms with the betrayal we face as partners of sex addicts. It helps us refocus on OUR lives and break out of our obsession with the sex addict(s) and all their garbage.Read more

Subjects:  1. Sex addiction